Every Olympics, or other merchandisable sporting event, needs two things: a logo that can be moaned about by graphic designers and perhaps looks from certain angles like a popular cartoon character performing an obscene act, pointless sponsorship, corporate fascism, and a mascot. Er, four things.
But the mascot is the most important. Who else is going to appear on T-shirts, baseball caps, pens, novelty birth control? Who’s going to keep the not-hugely-interested-in-the-sport crowd entertained during the interminable waits between “heats”? That’s right — the bloke in the costume. Some of our favourite mascots included World Cup 2006’s Goleo or “the pervert lion” and Mexico ’86’s Pique the racially stereotypical jalapeño pepper. And of course the London thing has Crooklock and Manabille.
The Bristow-lympics has employed top branding consultancy Boggle, Bogart, Heggertay and Biscuit to come up with ours. But they have decided that for engagement purposes that we hold a competition to come up with a suitable name.
So here he/she is:
and again, with a little tica-taca:
So you can win a special Dirty Bristow prize by naming our apiarian sporting pal. Leave a name here in the comments and we’ll pick the best one.
Compo is now closed. Winner will be announced soon.
Don’t forget you can see [insert name here] at the Bristow-lympics Opening Ceremony and Issue Two Launch on Saturday 13th Aug at The Edge in Birmingham City Centre. There’s loads more on too, go get yourself a ticket.
*a prize, at least.
Hairy Bella
Bristles “Big Stevie” Fortuna
Kings Heath Kong
Brizzlor, Ape Queen of the Heartlands
Two options for you so far:
1) Bertie Bristow
2) San Fran Bristow
I may well be back with more after a couple more glasses of wine.
alright, one more for now:
The Count of Monte Bristow
Or obviously just Monty Bristow for short…
Chub.
Miguel
Wazzock
Berty Fisto
Professor QT Wimlington III.
nice… not sure a false email best way to win a web prize tho ;)
Birty Wristjob
Karl Chin
Although if it came to a vote, I’d go for Bertie ‘Olympic rings’ Fistow.
don’t you mean simian?
“Words mean”, said Humpty Dumpty, “what I mean them to mean.”
have you thought about calling him Will Self?
Urma (not pronounced “your ma”)
Sebastian Briscoe
Dirty Eric
Boris Git-Wallor (it’s an anagram)